Confessional open!

This blog is being created to chronicle the pregnancy and birth of our newest addition. This is my first attempt at blogging, so please be patient with me!

A little about myself and my family:
I am Mary, age 35, wife to Jeff, age 36, mom to Ben, age 10, Megan, age 8, and Matthew, age 5.
I live at Fort Campbell Kentucky. My husband is a seargent first class in the active duty Army with 4 more years until retirement. He is scheduled to deploy sometime in October or November and return in December 2009. I'm originally from New York but grew up for many years in Southern Virginia. I am currently attending University of Phoenix and will receive my Bachelor's in Psychology in early 2010.

A little about this pregnancy:
I was shocked to say the least. After a miscarriage in 2007 we pretty much knew we wouldn't be having any more kids, although we didn't do anything about it. Mainly our decision was based upon the fact that we've faced fertility issues our whole marriage. I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome in 2007, along with prediabetes and hypothyroidism. That combination makes it pretty likely we would NOT get pregnant. So I had resolved myself to that, and settled in to get through adolescence.
With that being said, this child is NOT a mistake. Even though we were not trying, I always had it in the back of my head that it was a possibility. But that possibility seemed so slim that I really didn't think much about it.
I found out on a Monday night. I took a test because I had been extremely emotional that weekend, which if you know me isn't all that uncommon but it seemed odd nonetheless. Monday night's test was questionable. A line came up but it was so faint I was wondering if it was an evaporation line. For those who don't know that is a line that comes up on a home pregnancy test as a result of evaporation. I showed Jeff anyway and told him that perhaps he should change his R&R (Rest and Relaxation, the 2 weeks a soldier gets off during a deployment)to April. The look on Jeff's face was one of shock. I told him I wasn't 100% sure because the test was very iffy. He told me that he wasn't going to say anything until I knew for sure. That night I took another test and the result looked even lighter than the first, so I went to bed thinking it was an evaporation line. I dreampt the whole night about getting that BFP (Big Fat Positive).
The next morning I woke up around 5 am and tested. This time I set it on my bedside table and forced myself to go back to sleep. Talk about willpower! I got up at 7 am and looked over, and lo and behold was a faint pink line staring back at me. It wasn't bright, but it was definitely there!
OMG was my first thought! Second, was What have I done! Then the excitement started, and then the fear. You see just the thought of pregnancy means the thought of miscarriage, or something going wrong. Once you've been through something like that it changes you forever.
My next step was to go to my clinic to have it confirmed, or so I thought. It seems they take your word on it now, so I was sent off to OB to set my "OB orientation" class. It's this silly little class they make you take before you see the doctor. They talk about nutrition, spousal abuse, what to expect, etc. So I go and set my appointment (it's on the 28th) and tell them I need thyroid tests done ASAP. My last miscarriage was due to my thyroid level. They tell me they can't do it until I do the class. I didn't even make it to the class last time before I miscarried. They tell me to go back to the clinic. So I go back to the clinic and she tells me they can't do it unless I talk to a doctor. UGH! So finally she puts the bloodwork in and I go back to the hospital to have it drawn and then back to the clinic to have the doctor tell me the results. Are you following me on this one? Bottom line my thyroid levels were fine, but my beta HCG (pregnancy hormone) was low. I was pregnant, but not by much. MAN this is how my last miscarriage went. She told me to come back in 3 days for a repeat level. It's supposed to double every two days.
I go back on Friday and have my levels drawn and then back to the clinic to get the results. They won't just tell you, no, you have to wait for the "advice nurse" to tell you what they are. By my calculations anything above 50 would have been safe. My levels were 142!!
So now I just wait to take my class and get my first appointment scheduled, which is normally at 12 weeks. I'm scared and anxious something will go wrong, but I have faith and will cherish this little life for as long as I am able to carry it.
I'll post more later, but for now I'll close!